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The FDA Answers My Childhood Prayers 1

Sep

14

2006

Why couldn’t this warning have just been in place since 1981?

Onion Sports Fun 1

Sep

14

2006

Today they poke a bit of fun at one of my childhood heroes: Cal Ripken Jr. Moves Into 8 Billionth Place On Consecutive-Games-Not-Played List BALTIMORE—Cal Ripken Jr. celebrated a new milestone in his not-playing-baseball career on Tuesday as he moved into 8 billionth place on the… .onion_embed{ background:rgb(256,256,256)!important;border:4px solid rgb(65,160,65);border-width:4px 0 1px 0;margin:10px 30px!important;padding:5px;overflow:hidden!important;zoom:1;}.onion_embed img{ ...

Give Me One Reason 3

Sep

13

2006

Ok, contingent on there being decent cell reception in my new place: Can anyone think of one good reason I should keep my landline?

Where Do I Apply For A Canadian Work Visa Again?

Sep

12

2006

The secretary of the Air Force suggests testing crowd-control weapons on US citizens. I mean, I can sort of see the twisted logic that makes him think this is a good idea (i.e., if we’re not willing to use it on our citizens, then we shouldn’t be using it on foreigners because it will make ...

An Unexpected Snag

Sep

12

2006

Packing is going to take a lot longer than I thought it would if Chaplin keeps up his current trend of jumping in every single box I try to pack. I know cats really, really like boxes, but this is ridiculous.

Drumroll Please 1

Sep

12

2006

Annnnd the big news is: I’m moving! After five goddamn months of trying to get away from “GO STEELERS! *clap clap clap* WOOOOOOO! *clap clap clap*”, I finally found a place that is a) nice and b) not completely insanely priced (for California…for anywhere else except NYC, I’d be buying at least a condo). I’m ...

The Waiting Is The Hardest Part 2

Sep

12

2006

Possible big announcement coming tomorrow…well, today. Possible big venting of frustration. Stay tuned, it’ll be one or the other. Note: This has nothing to do with either this or this. Although both of these things do raise my gadget-nerd-o-meter to dangerous levels.

Dear Northwestern Football

Sep

9

2006

I want you to write I will not lose to a 1-AA team filling every blackboard and whiteboard on campus. Then I want you to start taking EVERY game seriously, you schmucks.

Oh, DC

Sep

7

2006

Not as dumb as the Wilson Bridge Jumper Asshat, but it comes pretty damn close.

NU Football Fun 1

Sep

6

2006

Link dump! Laz finds the most appropriately named NU Football reporter ever and ESPN reports on what is perhaps the oddest tribute to Randy Walker NU could possibly have come up with.