Bad Kitty

When you are on the phone trying to console someone over the loss of a beloved pet is a bad time to: a) Have your cat start yowling into the phone and b) When this does not get your attention to a satisfactory degree, start biting down on your arm to the point when you ...

For Mark and Jon A.

A whole lot of things are sent to my office, and occasionally, something amusing makes it through the dozens of people that see it before I do, and goes to the Free Pile. I’ve found some fun shit in the Free Pile, but I found a great one today. Someone sent in The Analyst, which ...

The Three Stages Of Hollywood Assimilation 5

So being after being sent on a spectacularly silly errand for a guest at the show today, I’ve come to realize that there are three stages of being assimilated into Total Hollywood Whoredom. They are, roughly: Stage One: “Ohmigod, I can’t believe I’m running weird errands for [celebrity]!” Usually found in younger residents and newer ...

Fun With Legislation

Did you watch Napoleon Dynamite? Then you will thoroughly enjoy the state of Idaho’s decree recognizing the filmmakers. This is the greatest bit of legislating I’ve seen in quite some time. A few of the choice “whereas”es: WHEREAS, tater tots figure prominently in this film thus promoting Idaho’s most famous export… WHEREAS, Uncle Rico’s football ...

Blogaversary 3.0 6

Three years ago today, with one simple, stupid post, I began a wonderful bout of time-wasting by starting this site. With friends’ blogs shutting down or being abandoned left and right and up and down, I find it a bit odd that my enthusiasm for this method of communication remains apparently unflagging. I think I’ve ...

Short Attention Span Theater 1

Have you ever been talking to someone with an attention span so short, they tell you back a joke that you JUST told them? I was at work today, loading heavy objects into people’s cars (the explanation of what they are and why would take pages) with a bunch of other people from work. It ...

Chicago: A Photo Tour 3

Chicago: A Photo Tour
So I had a good fun time in Chicago, and a few photos from select events to prove it. To wit: I stayed with my friend Joel, whose size 13 shoes can be found next to his gigantic goddamn cat, Socks, in this picture. The cat also snores like a rusty chainsaw. Another shot of ...

Farewell To A Newt 2

Casey has announced that he’s putting his blog out of business some undetermined time in the near future, bringing the level of hipster snark in my links to a critically low level. It’s too bad, because Casey’s a very entertaining writer, but I think he’s succumbed to something that can happen to any blogger: He ...

Yipes 5

When you were watching the sad circus surrounding Terri Schaivo’s last days, did you occasionally wonder who these people were that were protesting outside the hospice? I did. Now I come to find out I was in the same small dorm as one of them in college, as pointed out in an email from fellow ...

Back 6

I am, in fact alive, and back in LA. I almost died of shock when I came home and saw my cheap-o local gas station had spiked from 2.39 to 2.69 a gallon for regular while I was gone. Details of the Chicago trip (and super-cute pictures of Elisa’s baby) to come hopefully tonight, possibly ...