I saw this in the Onion and giggled, because this describes a few (though thankfully not too many) of my hiatus days to a frighteningly accurate degree: Noisy Upstairs Neighbors Wake Man At 3pm SAN LUIS OBISPO, CA—The inconsiderate residents of the apartment above Jim Bracker, 23, woke him from a sound slumber several minutes ...

Why do sunblock makers still feel a need to make their products reek of coconut? I slathered on sunblock since I’m going out in a bit, and as I wait for a call from the people I’m supposed to meet, I’m sitting in my apartment and slowly making the whole place smell like a piña ...

I made a purchase today that seems to show a dividing line among my friends: The hardcore techno-geeks from…well, the sane. I bought a little wireless netowrk reciever for my TiVo that allows me to schedule recordings via the internet while I’m out of town, and view photos and play mp3’s off my computer. The ...

I absolutely adore Six Feet Under. It’s really ironic, since I’m scared shitless of death, but that’s a post for another day. Today, we’re discussing television. It’s a fascinating show, and I just blew through all of the second season DVDs in three days. My new all-time favorite monologue in television history is uttered in ...

The ever-qualified Palm Beach Post has printed a list of the 50 worst songs by great artists. As with any list, this one has its strong points and its weak ones. Songs I agree belong on the list: In The Ghetto, Elvis Presley: I can’t even tell you how many times I had to listen ...

This article in the Washington Post is actually a fairly interesting look at the sociological impact of away messages. It does take a pretty big chunk out of the article to explain what away messages are, and it does have the rather macabre beginning of an away message suicide note. But the rest of the ...

From the L.A. Times story about Kerry and Edwards’ first day working together as presidential and vice-presidential candidates: “Any residual tensions from the two men’s competition during the Democratic primaries seemed to have evaporated. From the moment they stepped before a bank of more than 50 cameras Wednesday morning, emerging from the elegant Pittsburgh-area estate ...

I got a piece of spam today advertising an internet site wherein “Hot Amateur Sluts Go at It!” Nothing terribly out of the ordinary, but before I clicked it into the oblivion of my junkmail box, I had a thought: What’s the difference between an an amateur slut and a professional slut? Is it experience? ...

Well, at least they didn’t pretend nothing happened. Laz has the NY Post’s amusing admission of fucking up, along with the Daily News’ poking fun at them.

Not quite as good as that infamous headline, but still amusing: The story was so exclusive, someone forgot to tell John Kerry.