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My Irrational Hatred For Tourists Is Now Entirely Rational 1

Aug

25

2010

Sunday afternoon, I finished all my homework early. I wanted to have a nice long workout, and I debated going for a bike ride or going for a swim. It was a really nice day, so I decided to go for a bike ride. I should have gone for a swim. About 32 miles into ...

Things I Did Not Need To Find Out

May

31

2009

In case you’ve ever wondered, “So, what happens when you’re biking along and a car creates a small pothole and sends little chunks of asphalt everywhere?” I can now say: You hear the bang, and half a second later you feel an intense pain in your thigh. You pull over for a second, say, “OW, ...

Well, That’s Just Ducky 3

Nov

25

2008

I don’t know if it’s been reading about the potential SAG strike or the fact that we’re going to have a double-unit Monday to welcome us back from Thanksgiving, but apparently my problem of grinding my teeth has gotten a bit worse. And by “a bit worse” I mean, goddamn, the tendons in my jaw ...

So Close, But Yet So Far

Aug

17

2008

I went for a looooooong bike ride today. I wanted to do the entire Marvin Braude trail, but I came up a little short. The entire trail is 22 miles each way, and I have to bike 2 miles each way to get to the trail. If I’d done the whole thing, I would have ...

Yikes 2

Apr

12

2008

This probably wasn’t the most dignified way for the Caps to wind up tying their playoff game last night: Note the guy that falls over: He took a direct hit to the family jewels with the puck, and now the poor bastard might wind up minus one of them. Yow. Even being a Caps fan, ...

Interwebs! 1

Sep

8

2007

Not only interwebs, but the return of SPECTACULAR HD to the Gigantic Damn Television, on which I am currently watching Oregon stomp Michigan, and laaaaaaaaughing and laughing. The only problem is that I think I am going to need a bionic left foot. Anyone have a spare?

The Most Effective Diet Ever

May

15

2007

It’s called the “it takes a lot of effort and pain to get up” diet. It forces you to ask yourself: Exactly how hungry am I? Generally, the answer is: Okay, not that hungry. Also, ow.

Cowboy Up

Apr

17

2007

This is getting more ridiculous on a daily basis. So I went to Dr. Hot Shit, who I’d been trying to get in with for a while (and who I got some strings pulled to get into), in order to get a third and final opinion on my foot. Of course, he thinks something else ...

We’ve Managed to Bargain Them Down To…A Booting

Apr

10

2007

So my orthopedist stuck me in a boot for a couple weeks starting last Thursday to try and stabilize my collapsing arch. The boot is a little hilarious because it has a pump which can allegedly be used to pump up the cast to give more support. It’s about as effective as the pumps in ...

The Arms Race 3

Mar

26

2007

So in anticipation of probably at least needing some sort of surgery and having to cart my ass around on crutches for a period of time longer than five minutes, I’ve started lifting weights. The last time I was on crutches, I was on them for about three days of actually using them properly, and ...