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Fuck Off, I’m Listening To The Onion

Oct

25

2007

Today’s Onion Radio News provided me, and I hope shall provide you, with a sorely needed laugh. Audio definitely not safe for work, unless you’re either wearing headphones or work in an office that wholeheartedly believes in this research.

Odd Jobs

Aug

26

2007

I am not the only member of my family with a job that is a bit unusual. My stepbrother Rob does PR for Chik-Fil-A, which is how he ended up doing the weather in a cow costume on the local Fox morning show in Atlanta.

Embarassment 4

Aug

1

2007

…is trying to explain to my 70 year old father why this sign in Sun Valley cracks me up.

That Is The Question 3

Jul

10

2007

Will It Blend? is a hysterically awesome series of two-minute-ish videos produced by a company that makes industrial-strength blenders for the home. They take all sorts of shit (everything from a fruit smoothie to a rake to a bunch of old cellphones), toss it in one of their blenders, then ask the simple question, “Will ...

The Weird News Home Run

Jul

9

2007

I love a category of internet flotsam that could loosely be described as Weird News. The bizarre, the hilarious, and the truly ridiculous things that happen across the globe on a daily basis. The things that give Fark a reason to exist. There is a story today that just really hits it out of the ...

I Am Twelve

May

11

2007

Because I cannot stop giggling at this wedding announcement. The sad thing is, I think as bad as that is, it would have been even worse had they reversed the order of the names. Courtesy (who else?) Dave Barry’s Blog.

And How Was Your Cinco de Mayo?

May

6

2007

Did it go a little something like this? I have to say, they got the perfect announcer voice for that. The list of side effects is also great. Courtesy Dave Barry’s Blog.

How To Keep Your Kids Away From Drugs

Apr

17

2007

Don’t go for the usual scare tactics. Instead, show them true life tales of exactly how unbelievably dumb people can be when they are stoned: Two Men Arrested After Accidentally Dialing 911 While Trying To Page Their Dealer When Asked For Identification, Man Hands Cop His Pot Pipe And they will not want to smoke ...

Too Bad Winter’s Over 3

Apr

7

2007

One thing I do love about the end of winter is the proliferation of sales at various outdoor stores. Especially when they start trying to get rid of some of their more unusual products. “Glove not included” is one of the more amusing disclaimers I’ve seen in a while.

Contraption Update 2

Apr

3

2007

Remember that contraption to replace crutches I was talking about? I was showing the web page to people around the office, asking if they’d ever heard of anyone who’d used it. Turns out not only had my friend Pam heard of it, she knew the guy who invented it (back in the day when it ...