…so I can’t just send this directly to you. But I think there are other people who might be amused by this story from your hometown. The mental image conjured up by the first part of the story makes me start giggling uncontrollably.

Can we please have a kicker that doesn’t suck? Love, Northwestern University

A small contest to tide you over the remaining hour or so until the Sun Bowl starts. Will the Northwestern and UCLA score combined equal: a) 50 points or fewer b) 51-100 points c) 101-150 points d) 150 points or more Place your bets in the comments. Winner gets a whole bunch of fudge my ...

I’m home! Thank God! More importantly, I’m on the ground and not seated behind the door of the airplane that’s leaking cold inside, so much so that i couldn’t feel my feet for about 20 minutes after I got off the plane. Also, it takes half a MPC Computers Bowl and a full Alamo Bowl ...

My mom gave me a very nice and unexpected bonus gift for Christmas this year. My dad’s late mother had given her some nice linen napkins and a linen tablecloth when they got married, and my mom passed them on to me. They’re still in great shape, and they’re monogrammed. And that’s where the hilarity, ...

Well, after about one hour of sleep, almost missing both my flights (thanks to an asstastic cab company and somehow losing 20 minutes in the air beteween LA and Cincy, respectively), I finally made it to CT. I’m exhausted, my head still hurts from improper depressurization (it felt like someone was jabbing me in the ...

My flight to Connecticut leaves at 6:50am, which means I have to be out the door no later than 5:30, probalby more like 5:15. I have not packed. My apartment looks like a tornado hit it. I might need to do laundry. I believe I may be pulling an all-nighter.

My cat is smart. A little too smart for his own good, it turns out. He’s figured out how to open cabinet doors. For the most part, this is adorable. But there’s two sets of cabinets (under the two sinks in my apartment) that he definitely should not be getting into, due to their high ...

But every once in a while, I see a story that makes me miss living in a place where it snows a lot. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Snowzilla: That is so fucking awesome, it almost makes me want to live somewhere where I could build one of my own. Almost.

So I just got an email informing me that I’ve actually made some money with my music for the first time in a while, due to fabulous digital distribution. Yes, you know that the iTunes music store will let any old hooligan in when they even have my album (WARNING: Link opens in iTunes). I’m ...