Do you like the old video game Asteroids? Then you will highly enjoy the version with broccoli and asparagus. Thanks to the productivity enchancement department at Dave Barry’s Weblog.

Tom Shales, while reviewing the new HBO series Deadwood for the Washington Post, has a brief aside about censorship that I think tops even Timberlake’s “wardrobe malfunction” phrase for a description of the infamous Super Bowl incident: “The timing can only be a coincidence, since “Deadwood” has been in production for months and months, but ...

I measure my groceries in bulk. By which I mean, I expect to pay a certain amount for a certain heaviness/pain in the ass of getting up the stairs-ness of groceries. But the last two weeks have completely thrown me off in this quest. To wit: I bought a shitload of groceries last week for ...

The fabulous Miss Cleo is coming to visit. This is the good news, for it shall be fun. The bad news is that she’s the first houseguest (who’s actually staying here) I’ve had since I moved into my apartment six months ago. Which means that it’s Flight Of The Bumblebee Cleaning Time! The definite advantage ...

I just got back from seeing the Old 97’s at the Troubadour. The show was fucking awesome, and they debuted a bunch of songs from their new album, which is going to kick serious ass. But I made two major mistakes. 1. I forgot my earplugs. 2. I stood directly in front of Ken Bethea’s ...

The Dialectizer is a wonderous little time-waster. You’ve all seen stuff like it before, it translates stuff into assorted languages, but I highly recommend Swedish Chef and Elmer Fudd languages. Highly entertaining. Stolen from Dave Barry’s weblog

From Dave‘s blog comes the Inane Quiz of the Day: You are YOU CAN’T DO THAT ON TELEVISION. Sometimes, you wonder why you couldn’t just be Canadian. Some people say you are weird. You have an interesting sense of humor and a meaningless life. But, you’re nearly Canadian, so did you expect better? Which old ...

Man, my neighbors must be smoking some strong, strong weed if I can smell it, but couldn’t smell pizza and ravioli that was directly in front of my face at lunch.

I’m feeling a bit better, though I’m still surrounded by a dense protective wall of tissues that collectively contain the better part of my lungs. I’m realllllllly looking forward to working 13-hour days all week to make up for the day I took off on Friday. Woo. However, it was nice to spend a weekend ...

(cough cough cough) I’m sick (cough cough). Posting in depth will recommence when coughing and feeling like shit ceases. Which at this rate will be 2032. (cough).