Ellen Shapiro dot com ← Tech :: Music

Easter Fun 1

Mar

29

2007

One of my coworkers received a large box of Easter crap from his folks today, including an enormous number of Peeps. I commented that we should microwave them, and someone asked why. Peeps, as has been repeatedly documented, expand to several times their original size in the microwave, and then poof out in an awesomely ...

D’oh

Mar

29

2007

My physical therapist threw in the towel today. I’m not making any progress with anything other than the exercises I’m doing at home, so he doesn’t see much point in me continuing to come in. I can sort of understand, since I can do quite a bit of stuff on my own, and I suppose ...

I Stand Corrected

Mar

27

2007

I was bitching about my continuing singlehood to some friends this weekend, saying it felt like I was in the midst of the longest dry streak in the world. It was good to learn that I still have a ways to go before I can claim that title. Courtesy, of course, Dave Barry’s Blog.

The Arms Race 3

Mar

26

2007

So in anticipation of probably at least needing some sort of surgery and having to cart my ass around on crutches for a period of time longer than five minutes, I’ve started lifting weights. The last time I was on crutches, I was on them for about three days of actually using them properly, and ...

You Kids Get Off My Videogame System! 2

Mar

24

2007

Now I know why I can’t find a damn Wii: They’re being snapped up by retirement communities. Well, and everyone else and their brother, mother, sister, and now grandparents. The video that’s on that story is pretty cute though, especially the 89 year old woman who hasn’t bowled since 1945.

The Revenge of Mr. Cranky Ankle

Mar

22

2007

I had a longstanding follow-up appointment with my orthopedist today. I walked back and he was talking to my physical therapist (whose office is across the hall). After I finished giving the PT a light berating for Tuesday’s fiasco, the orthopedist came in, and started investigating why my foot’s not getting better. His conclusion: Two ...

Road To Hell Good Intentions Yadda Yadda

Mar

21

2007

So Tuesday was a miserably shittastic day for me, because my physical therapist decided one of my legs was shorter than the other. I’d gone in for my weekly physical therapy, and while I’ve been making some progress with Mister Cranky Ankle, it’s been excruciatingly slow. So he did some rather unscientific tests and became ...

Religious Update 2

Mar

19

2007

You know, if this were the text used at the Seder my stepmom keeps harassing me to go to, I might actually go one of these years. Courtesy, once again, Dave Barry’s Blog

Oh Lord, Won’t You Buy Me A Mercedes-Benz?

Mar

16

2007

I drove mine into a river following bad GPS directions and it was swept away, I must make amends… Special bonus quote with hilarious British town name: Although the track is signposted as ‘unsuitable for motor vehicles’, the driver carried on and found herself at a ford in the village of Sheepy Magna. courtesy Dave ...

Chaplin Loves the Colbert Report

Mar

14

2007

So much so that he decided to do his impression of Stephen Colbert in front of the Gigantic Damn Television: click to enlarge