I may work for House, but I have absolutely no idea why our opening credits music was playing under a crucial scene in Prison Break tonight. It worked in context, but damn, that was distracting.

Chaplin’s been waking me up at 4:30 the last few mornings to stare me in the face then bite me on the nose once I wake up, so I thought perhaps I should get him something new to amuse himself with. I went to the pet store and found this awesome giant mouse/scratching post that’s ...

I bitch about $3.25 a gallon gas, but in Britain, it’s a bit worse: Graham, 48, a London building contractor, pointed at the price on the pump — the equivalent of $6.62 a gallon, which means it costs him $125 to fill his tank. Ouch.

A few tips from Tiki Night with co-workers last night at the Tiki Ti: 1. Tiki Night should not take place on a night where you have to work the next day. You will be sorry. 2. Make sure you eat something nice and greasy before Tiki Night commences. I did not obey this rule, ...

Is it too late in history to take idiots like these people and behead them and put their heads on pikes as a warning to others who would follow the same path? Priya…received a Mercedes convertible and an assortment of diamond jewelry for her birthday. Her sister’s graduation gift package included a Bentley, diamonds and ...

Looking back at the many changes in my life over the last few years, one’s been sticking out like a sore thumb to me recently. Since when have I become obsessed with being organized? My apartment is spotless. This has never happened in a place where I live…ever. My desk at work is clean every ...

You have to not only eat some of it for dinner (thus defeating the eat-it-whenever point of purchasing frozen food), but you have to move vodka out of your freezer in order to make room for all of it. Or perhaps that’s a sign you have too much booze in your house, that the vodka ...

If you think you’re interested in seeing this movie, stay home and watch an episode of 24 instead. It’s the same general concept: Someone wants to kill the President. Kiefer must stop them before they do. Ostensibly, Michael Douglas also must do so, but he spends about two thirds of the movie running around like ...

I hate that I like Cute Overload, especially since their super-precious writing style drives me totally nuts. But how can you resist pictures like this: It’s so fucking cute, I feel the need to go hug my cat after looking at it. There’s something terribly wrong about that. Ugh, I feel dirty. I think I ...