You know, I’ve thought a lot of the things I’ve had to do to care for my various incisions over the past couple of months have been embarassing, painful, sometimes even downright stupid. But today, I think we got a winner for the most ridiculous.
After essentially spray-gluing a bunch of strips of some sort of medical tape to my appendix scar to keep it closed now that the staples are out, the doctor said to me, “Now, do you have a hair dryer?”
“What?”
“A hair dryer. You don’t have to change this, but you do have to blow-dry it for about thirty seconds when you get it wet.”
Do you have any idea how absurd it is to blow-dry your abdomen?
I just had to do this for the first time, and I couldn’t stop laughing, holding the blow dryer and pointing it at this series of tape strips. The laughter made it start to really hurt, but alas, that just made it even funnier.
My life has clearly been transported into some sort of parallel universe.