Scenes From My Three Hours At LAX

The Hilarious

I got to the airport three hours before my flight, as directed, a feat accomplished by literally sprinting out of work, then doing a flight-of-the-bumblebee at home of grabbing my stuff and feeding my cat and almost grabbing my cat instead of my laptop when the cab came.

I’d printed out my boarding pass earlier in the day to speed things along, but when I got to the top of the escalator to the security lines, I burst out laughing.

There were eight people in the three running metal detector lines. I got through in under five minutes, including the time it took to remove and replace my belt and shoes.

The Ironic

I waited longer in line for CPK than I did for security. Like, three to four times longer.

The Triumphant

After almost six months of trying to get my computer to cooperate and use my Swiss Army Phone as a modem, I finally got it working. It’s slow as shit and kills the batteries on both the phone and my laptop, but if you’re reading this, it works.

Also, I found a power outlet at CPK, so my bringing you this update doesn’t totally kill my battery and I can still watch Pinky and the Brain on the plane if I don’t immediately pass out upon taking my seat.

Leave a Reply