This Story Is Only Hilarious Because I Lived To Tell The Tale 3

I’ve been riding Bike 2.0 around a lot – partly to break it in, and partly because of an ear infection that’s keeping me out of the pool until after Thanksgiving. Since I ride on the Pacific Coast Highway and through Westwood Village quite a bit, I see a lot of really stupid driver behavior ...

Always A Good Sign 1

Clearly, I’m ready to start school  next week with the goal of getting a Masters’ in Computer Science when I failed so hard at researching my new monitor/TV combo for the bedroom that I ordered one that can’t be controlled by a goddamn remote. I took one guy’s statement in a review about being able ...

Even The Graphics Department Was Surprised

A screencap from the Northwestern Online Store, who were apparently just as surprised as the rest of us by the upgrade to the Outback bowl: To be fair, the email they sent out that I clicked on to get to that page had the properly photoshopped hat with the Outback logo on it….though all the ...

How To Accessorize Your Shredder Oil 2

I recently bought a new shredder after thoroughly destroying my old one, and in doing some research I realized that part of the problem was that the shredder was never properly lubricated. Apparently, it helps to put oil on moving metal parts. Who knew? Anyway, I wound up buying some shredder oil off Amazon because ...

And I Thought The Guy With The Batman Tramp Stamp Was Bad 2

Dear Guy Getting Out Of The Sauna While I Was Getting Out Of The Pool, 1. Your reverse mohawk with sideburns that go most of the way down your neck does not look cool, nor does it hide the fact that you’re balding. It makes you look like you fell out of 1997, and not ...

Well Done, Sir

The illustrious Casey Newton brings us a story from the wilds of Phoenix, where the Mayor of that city decided it would be a great idea to climb a tree to clear debris from a big storm. The tree disagreed, and the Mayor took a 13-foot header, resulting in a fractured vertebrae. My favorite section: ...

It’s Only Pronounced Fee-nix 3

To balance out my bragging in the post below, I thought I’d share a story about how unbelievably stupid I (as well as several other people I shall not name to protect their pride) felt after bar trivia on Thursday. The last question was fairly straightforward: There are twelve state capitals that start with the ...

I Just Can’t Live Without Rageahol! 2

You ever have one of those moments where something stupid occurs, and you get disproportionately angry about how stupid it is? You realize you’re overreacting a bit, but it’s just SO flamingly stupid, you get a bit worked up about it? I went to a free screening of American Gangster with a friend in the ...

Dear Asshat Neighbor

You are not the same neighbor over-alarming his 1989 Nissan. You live in the building across the alley from mine, and you park in a spot under your building that’s not walled in, directly across the alley from my window. You have a new car, but you have purchased a very similar but infinitely louder ...

Ah, L.A.

The next time someone asks me what it’s like to live in Los Angeles with all the celebrities you can see, I am going to direct them to this page. The writer has perfectly captured the grand “I don’t give a fuck about these morons anymore” feeling you get after about a year here. via ...