Breaking Out An Old Meme 2

You’re all now officially On Notice.

You Would Think…

…that going to Best Buy at 3pm on a Tuesday, it would be at least a little calmer than it generally is around the holidays. You would apparently be wrong, as evidenced by the HUGE line there when I stopped by to pick up gifts for my cousins this afternoon. You would also think that ...

Signs That Perhaps It’s Time To Start More Seriously Cleaning Your Apartment

When chasing down tumbleweeds of cat hair with a dustbuster, you vacuum up enough of it to create an entirely new cat.

An Inauspicious Sunday 2

Two items today that together are a real great way to kick off the week: First, last night there were some serious Santa Ana winds blowing, and my power (and the power to the rest of my block) went out. To SoCal Edison’s credit, it was back on within the hour. However, one key item ...

The Thing Under The Stairs

A photo essay, starring Felina, my neighbor’s cat: Felina now is just about as tired of my camera as Chaplin is. Although I did get Chap to do this, which amuses me to no end.

Dear Asshat Neighbor

You are not the same neighbor over-alarming his 1989 Nissan. You live in the building across the alley from mine, and you park in a spot under your building that’s not walled in, directly across the alley from my window. You have a new car, but you have purchased a very similar but infinitely louder ...


Monday I sent a complaint to my landlord about the fact that a fence got torn out and while it had been replaced with some bamboo, it wasn’t exactly secure. Last night, I came home to find a three ton dumpster that had previously been in a vacant parking space now sitting in my parking ...

Heat Rises 2

I love my apartment, but being here all the time points out to me with a flashing neon sign its one very glaring flaw: It’s fucking hotter than hell in here. I live on the second floor of my building. There’s very little shade, the airflow is poor, heat rises from downstairs, and when the ...

Dear Dipshit Neighbor

I know you prize your ’89 Nissan, but when moderate rain sets off the alarm repeatedly, you’ve made it too sensitive.

Because People Like To Say Salsa

A couple days ago, a new vehicle arrived in the parking lot behind my building. It’s a bright blue PT Cruiser, wrapped in an ad for a small salsa company with tons of bright yellow chips and bright red bottles of salsa. And bright yellow New Mexico license plates. I am so very, very confused.