The Empty Bottle Wasn’t Half-Empty

I’ve come up with a new weight loss plan, because I’ve put back on a bit of the weight I lost while on the Soul-Crushing Stress Of College diet earlier this year.

The new plan: The Overcrowded Rock Club Sweat It Out plan.

This plan was developed this evening when I went to see the Chicago Kings, a drag king troupe doing their thing because the big gay parade is tomorrow.

They were playing at the Empty Bottle, an excellently sketchy club here in Chicago that’s normally used by punk or rock bands, and not a massive herd of lesbians and about six gay men.

There were a whole lot of people there, quite a few more than I suspect the fire code allows, and the place is not air conditioned, so it was really goddamn hot.

This is something I don’t get: Many, many places in Chicago have no air conditoning. I think a large part of it is the mindset that most people have that Chicago = cold.

But what people tend to forget is that in the summer, Chicago can get really fuckin’ hot.

And you go into places, many of them cheapo restaurants like the infamous Mr. Beef down near work (referred to by the denziens of Post Effects as Mystery Beef) and the temperature inside is approximately the same as that on the surface of the sun. I can’t imagine what it’s like to work there.

Anyway, so it’s really, really hot at the Empty Bottle because there were at least a couple hundred people there, and the place is just not built to hold that many, and I figured out that I was probably sweating out more calories than I had eaten that evening.

Certainly it was enough to make everyone stop caring what they looked or smelled like, because they knew everybody else looked and smelled just as bad, because we were all in this together, stinking and frizzing away.

Thus the new plan. Not as cheap as the S-CSOC diet, but a hell of a lot more fun.

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